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Firstly, I must say thank you all for your comments, favorites and watches. It's been overwhelming to see so much positive support of my work. Usually I thank each person individually but there are actually too many to keep doing that! Can you believe it?
So from the heart, I'll thank you all here instead. Each comment, fave and watch builds me up to keep making work and sharing personal thoughts and ideas about transitioning and other things in life that I want to work through using art.
I have recovered from surgery now, and life goes on. It was quite terrifying to jump into the world without hitting a wall for the first time. You see, it was hard to live life before surgery, because the waiting and not knowing threw up so many barriers for me in so many facets of life. With those walls all suddenly stripped away, stepping out into the world was a challenge. Like a rabbit that doesn't run from the hutch once the door is open, I was hesitant to try and fail at things I had not been able to even attempt before.
I can say now though that I am running full speed and achieving things I never thought I could. There will always be walls that come up in life, but I remind myself that after achieving such a huge goal, there is nothing else I can't do if I really set my mind to it, use my resources and time, and believe in my dreams.
I have not had much time to make artwork for a while now since I've been leaping into life, but hopefully there will be more to come soon. Thank you all once again for all of your support. If anybody wants to talk about transitioning please don't hesitate to send me a note. While I am not a therapist or councilor, I can certainly share my personal experiences with you.
- Saku
So from the heart, I'll thank you all here instead. Each comment, fave and watch builds me up to keep making work and sharing personal thoughts and ideas about transitioning and other things in life that I want to work through using art.
I have recovered from surgery now, and life goes on. It was quite terrifying to jump into the world without hitting a wall for the first time. You see, it was hard to live life before surgery, because the waiting and not knowing threw up so many barriers for me in so many facets of life. With those walls all suddenly stripped away, stepping out into the world was a challenge. Like a rabbit that doesn't run from the hutch once the door is open, I was hesitant to try and fail at things I had not been able to even attempt before.
I can say now though that I am running full speed and achieving things I never thought I could. There will always be walls that come up in life, but I remind myself that after achieving such a huge goal, there is nothing else I can't do if I really set my mind to it, use my resources and time, and believe in my dreams.
I have not had much time to make artwork for a while now since I've been leaping into life, but hopefully there will be more to come soon. Thank you all once again for all of your support. If anybody wants to talk about transitioning please don't hesitate to send me a note. While I am not a therapist or councilor, I can certainly share my personal experiences with you.
- Saku
What stupid poem could fix this home?
After reading some poetry the other day, I had some words of my own. I'm not especially active on this account any more, but I didn't really know where else to share this. --- Transgender. Transgender. Trans. Gender. Agenda. What’s my agenda? Transgender transgender. I want to be me. I need to be “He.” I’m not coming to get you. I am not a spy. I don’t laugh to myself that I’m fooling you as you look at me Behind my beard there’s a maniac When you’re entwined I will whip of my jeans and laugh Ha ha, I had a vagina all along... Ass. Transgender. Agenda. Maybe I’ll break into your sacred space and And... No, I’m not here to fool you. I am not here for you at all, not even to teach I don’t have to be an activist Just to exist Transgender transgender How strong is this umbrella? Am I changing the world enough? It’s not safe to be High risk jobs never pay Like doctors and nurses fighting gloved and coated But we do them anyway
[I speak for myself]
There are countless scary things to consider when transitioning. So many in fact it’s a really daunting task to even consider listing them all. In a way, it’s an impossible task too, because of the simple fact that each person will experience a very different set of hurdles when making the leaps towards becoming themselves.
Of course we will inevitably share common grievances as well, like coming out to friends and family, figuring out which bathroom to use or which box to tick, being subject to transphobia or fighting for help and support though GP’s and clinics. It’s probably the struggle against these hazards that
[That's not Art]
I’ve always used drawing as a way to express myself. I think we all did as children, before we decided our drawings weren't good enough and moved on. It’s funny how “that’s not how its supposed to look” can stop us from trying to get there, isn’t it? I’ve learned not to let that stop me.
As a child, in between all the drawings of Link, Mario and Sonic the Hedgehog, I used to vent through my pictures. I vividly remember drawing a grotesque mouth pulled into a smile with wires when I was feeling depressed at around age eight. (Although I could blame watching Pink Floyd’s: The Wall one too many ti
[One year surgery anniversary]
One year ago today, I had a bilateral mastectomy on my chest. It doesn't feel like long ago, and the time before it is sort of a blur. I remember how I used to look, but not how it used to feel.
When I first had my operation everyone was asking me "are you happy?" and "is it liberating?" to which I didn't have an answer. Directly after surgery I had a bout of post operation depression which lasted a fair few months. I never thought I'd made a mistake, but I never got a glorious rush of HALLELUJAH that it seemed like I was supposed to have.
In a way, I guess it's because it was more like a quiet sigh of relief. I was never supposed to look t
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